Walking Barefoot in Snow

When i was in the second grade my Teacher, Mrs. Friedman, called me "Bold".  I remember her face while she said this but not why.  It was not a compliment or meant to encourage.  Without knowing exactly what this meant, I felt the sting. To this day i can't imagine what quiet, scared - fade into the background MB ever could have said or done to be considered "Bold".  I was a shadow girl, never looking to be the center of attention, always afraid of what someone might think of me. As a grown woman, I own my boldness.  I glory in its presence.  Welcome, and may you never leave my side. I've been called "Clutzy" "Chubby" "Awkward" by my mother as i was growing up.  Never "capable" for getting myself ready for school every morning during elementary school with no parent there to assist,  "smart" for reading and understanding everything i could lay my hands on, or  "beautiful"........because i was ...

Will there ever be a time of 100% satisfaction with my life?  If i'm happy with work, my personal life seems lacking.  When my personal life is full and happy, Work is giving me issues.  Is this just the way we go?  Always looking for the next situation that needs improving or expansion? I'm doing the thing that I always thought would be the worst.  Living alone.  The thought always filled me with sadness, a certain desperation that anything would be better than being alone.  And then one day i realized i craved it, instead of fearing it.  I finally started learning instead of trying to assert my will on people to be what i needed and wanted them to be.  I started being the person i need most.  It hasn't been easy.  I'm a tough customer.  In realizing that I needed to have my own space, where i answered to no-one but myself (and the landlord, bill collectors and employer) I literally felt a deep sadness in me release. ...