Names i've been called

When i was in the second grade my Teacher, Mrs. Friedman, called me "Bold".  I remember her face while she said this but not why.  It was not a compliment or meant to encourage.  Without knowing exactly what this meant, I felt the sting.

To this day i can't imagine what quiet, scared - fade into the background MB ever could have said or done to be considered "Bold".  I was a shadow girl, never looking to be the center of attention, always afraid of what someone might think of me.

As a grown woman, I own my boldness.  I glory in its presence.  Welcome, and may you never leave my side.

I've been called "Clutzy" "Chubby" "Awkward" by my mother as i was growing up.  Never "capable" for getting myself ready for school every morning during elementary school with no parent there to assist,  "smart" for reading and understanding everything i could lay my hands on, or  "beautiful"........because i was a child who needed her mother to think so.

As a grown woman I am "not athletic", "soft and curvy", and "introverted".  This is who I am, and I own it.  I glory in the truth of how I am me.  Welcome, and may you never leave my side.

I've been called "bitch" by men who were weak and threatened by my ability to see through their bullshit.  "Fucking Bitch" by the same men, who could not control me any longer.

I am a bitch.  I will continue to be a bitch, hopefully a  bigger and better bitch every day.

Recently, I've been called "Surly" and "passive aggressive" by a man at work who does not actually work with me.  I had previously held respect for this man, until his name calling made me realize his weakness, and his own inability to lead.  How enlightening, and disappointing coming an educated man.

I am "assertive" and "not afraid of conflict", which means, i will not sit silently by and be maligned.  Period.  Bullies come in all shapes and sizes, at home, in public and at work.  I was scared by them as a child, but I am no longer a child.  I am a grown woman.

I do not accept abuse quietly.  Never. Again.  Welcome, strong, opinionated and sometimes wrong woman.  May you never leave my side.

I've been called "cunt", "asshole", "Fat", "stupid", "crazy"........to my face.  I'm sure i've been called more behind my back.  I've earned a few, i've been unjustly accused of others.....I do not accept any as a self identifying characteristic.

I am a grown woman, who loves hard, who is afraid of trusting, who works hard, who is afraid of not being appreciated, who loves alone time, who is afraid of being alone.  I am lazy, yet driven.  I am many many things and I am not defined by what others call me.

I am Maribeth.  Welcome, may you never leave my side.