It's time.
Now that i'm living in Manchester, making a life here - I need to work closer to home. This commute is wasting a minimum of 2 hours a day from my time to do other things. More fun things than dodging in and out of traffic....yes, i'm that person now. I will say that ever since i've had to commute i've become aggressive on the road. The ride is too long to be polite. I DON'T terrify passengers however.........because he is 5lbs and can barely see out the window.
It's time.
I've taken harassment and general disregard from ONE person at work for 6 years. I'm tired. I've done my time with difficult people and honestly, they can't pay me enough to work for her anymore and they never did. It's no longer a challenge to try and keep her happy. It can't be done. She wins. She is the ONE person i've worked for who finds nothing but fault. I can thank her though, because even with the commute i was finding it hard to leave these people behind. I love my job, I'm lucky enough to work with wonderful people in a learning environment on a gorgeous campus. And her. She is the kick in the ass I need to move along.
It's time.
This position is the last piece of the past.....I want to be somewhere he has never been, with no humiliating memories. I don't want to "see" him in that parking lot, refusing to look at me or talk to me while Josh took care of me and my vehicle. I'll never forget how that felt, or that he could do it to me. I don't want to ever drive by the ice cream shop where i sat with him the last time, while he cried to me about his baby mama. Me, the woman who's life he had just picked up and smashed. I'll never forget that either, because that was when i finally realized that this man had never loved me. He wasn't capable. So yes, I want to leave those ghosts behind. I don't want to see places and things every day that make me remember my willingness to accept less than i deserve.
It's time.
It's time to fully trust the space i'm in now, celebrate the choices i've made that have brought me here - confident, not afraid, able to make choices of my own and leave others to do the same. Not everyone is going to like me all the time- and i don't have to have any feelings about it. I can just do what i want, and when i want, with who i want....and it's okay. My family, my friends, my man- they love me just like i am.
It's time I do too.
Now that i'm living in Manchester, making a life here - I need to work closer to home. This commute is wasting a minimum of 2 hours a day from my time to do other things. More fun things than dodging in and out of traffic....yes, i'm that person now. I will say that ever since i've had to commute i've become aggressive on the road. The ride is too long to be polite. I DON'T terrify passengers however.........because he is 5lbs and can barely see out the window.
It's time.
I've taken harassment and general disregard from ONE person at work for 6 years. I'm tired. I've done my time with difficult people and honestly, they can't pay me enough to work for her anymore and they never did. It's no longer a challenge to try and keep her happy. It can't be done. She wins. She is the ONE person i've worked for who finds nothing but fault. I can thank her though, because even with the commute i was finding it hard to leave these people behind. I love my job, I'm lucky enough to work with wonderful people in a learning environment on a gorgeous campus. And her. She is the kick in the ass I need to move along.
It's time.
This position is the last piece of the past.....I want to be somewhere he has never been, with no humiliating memories. I don't want to "see" him in that parking lot, refusing to look at me or talk to me while Josh took care of me and my vehicle. I'll never forget how that felt, or that he could do it to me. I don't want to ever drive by the ice cream shop where i sat with him the last time, while he cried to me about his baby mama. Me, the woman who's life he had just picked up and smashed. I'll never forget that either, because that was when i finally realized that this man had never loved me. He wasn't capable. So yes, I want to leave those ghosts behind. I don't want to see places and things every day that make me remember my willingness to accept less than i deserve.
It's time.
It's time to fully trust the space i'm in now, celebrate the choices i've made that have brought me here - confident, not afraid, able to make choices of my own and leave others to do the same. Not everyone is going to like me all the time- and i don't have to have any feelings about it. I can just do what i want, and when i want, with who i want....and it's okay. My family, my friends, my man- they love me just like i am.
It's time I do too.
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