I am grateful for this cup of steaming black coffee and the last piece of apple crumb pie that i just ate for BREAKFAST.,
Happy Thanksgiving! Really. I mean it. No sarcasm.
It's early, the house is quiet aside from the "tinks" that come from the heat occasionally. Heat. I'm so grateful for HEAT that comes on with the flick of a switch.
My eyes popped open this morning and my little love was curled up next to me instead of my big love...like he knew i needed the reminder that i am his first love. I am grateful for Miyagi, the 5 pound furry little ferocious (he thinks so) beast that literally saved my sanity. I am grateful for his wiggly welcome back dance, his licks, his head butts, his happy bark and his soulful eyes that balance his adorable underbite. I am his. I gave myself to his unconditional love the moment i met him and it was the best thing I ever did.
Just like i gave myself over to the myth of love at first sight. My brain fought it, my destiny continued it's course without me. My big love, Michael. I am grateful for his ability to be gentle and kind while being 100 % male. I am grateful to be his equal, at full steam ME, and that not only can he handle me, he seems to enjoy me. He is my match, my happy medium, my complete trust, my comfort and excitement. He sees me, for who i am, for how i am, for what i look like (cleaned up and NOT) and all i can see is the love reflected in his eyes. What i'm most grateful for is that twinkle in his blue eyes that caught me and ended my search. I am grateful to have finally found him.
And while i was searching for myself and for my footing I learned just how grateful I am for my family. My children, no longer children - grown up and living their lives but who always check in on me, make sure i'm okay - that i'm happy. They are my success. Both know how to take care of themselves and others, both independent and strong willed. I am grateful that they put up with my flightiness, my inability to call them every time i think of them (they would change their numbers if i did) I am grateful that when i was at my lowest point the thought of them lifted me as proof of the good things i accomplished in my lifetime. There are times that i can't believe how lucky i am that they have grown into the adults they are, in spite of my many mistakes and imperfections. I am grateful that my children fill my heart not only with love, but with pride.
My friends. How can i fit all the emotion and gratefulness that i have for each of them into that word "friend". I need a grander term. Until then, I will say that I am grateful for each of them in different ways but all of them for showing me constant love and support and encouragement through my dark days, and laughing so hard with me that we peed on my good days. I am grateful for no bullshit in my face talks, snapping me out of my self pity rides. I am grateful for the coffees that were clutched while i constantly repeated what everyone already knew, yet they let me say it like it was the first time. I am grateful for long scandalous conversations, .I am grateful for rides given when i purposely drank too much. I am grateful for the hugs, the kisses, the i love yous, the constant and steady reminder that i was worth loving. You saved me when i couldn't save myself.
This year I am the most grateful for myself. I know this looks selfish, however, it's been a long time, like never. I am grateful that no matter what happens in my life I have the ability to love, and be loved. I am grateful that i have found my trust again - that my bitterness did not cause blindness- that i was able to appreciate the love in my life that comes from all directions - from my children, my friends, my co-workers even, and my self. I am grateful to have finally found my self worth and my happiness.
To friends and family in the past, I am grateful to have known you and have you shape my present. I am grateful that each person in my past has brought me to this point and that my lessons were learned, the love that was shared will never be forgotten and the memories bring smiles to my face. I am grateful to have been shaped by having you in my life for the time you were there.
My wish this year, on the day of thanks is that all my loved ones realize their value in my life and in the lives of others. Eat, drink, be happy and share the love! Happy Thanksgiving.
Happy Thanksgiving! Really. I mean it. No sarcasm.
It's early, the house is quiet aside from the "tinks" that come from the heat occasionally. Heat. I'm so grateful for HEAT that comes on with the flick of a switch.
My eyes popped open this morning and my little love was curled up next to me instead of my big love...like he knew i needed the reminder that i am his first love. I am grateful for Miyagi, the 5 pound furry little ferocious (he thinks so) beast that literally saved my sanity. I am grateful for his wiggly welcome back dance, his licks, his head butts, his happy bark and his soulful eyes that balance his adorable underbite. I am his. I gave myself to his unconditional love the moment i met him and it was the best thing I ever did.
Just like i gave myself over to the myth of love at first sight. My brain fought it, my destiny continued it's course without me. My big love, Michael. I am grateful for his ability to be gentle and kind while being 100 % male. I am grateful to be his equal, at full steam ME, and that not only can he handle me, he seems to enjoy me. He is my match, my happy medium, my complete trust, my comfort and excitement. He sees me, for who i am, for how i am, for what i look like (cleaned up and NOT) and all i can see is the love reflected in his eyes. What i'm most grateful for is that twinkle in his blue eyes that caught me and ended my search. I am grateful to have finally found him.
And while i was searching for myself and for my footing I learned just how grateful I am for my family. My children, no longer children - grown up and living their lives but who always check in on me, make sure i'm okay - that i'm happy. They are my success. Both know how to take care of themselves and others, both independent and strong willed. I am grateful that they put up with my flightiness, my inability to call them every time i think of them (they would change their numbers if i did) I am grateful that when i was at my lowest point the thought of them lifted me as proof of the good things i accomplished in my lifetime. There are times that i can't believe how lucky i am that they have grown into the adults they are, in spite of my many mistakes and imperfections. I am grateful that my children fill my heart not only with love, but with pride.
My friends. How can i fit all the emotion and gratefulness that i have for each of them into that word "friend". I need a grander term. Until then, I will say that I am grateful for each of them in different ways but all of them for showing me constant love and support and encouragement through my dark days, and laughing so hard with me that we peed on my good days. I am grateful for no bullshit in my face talks, snapping me out of my self pity rides. I am grateful for the coffees that were clutched while i constantly repeated what everyone already knew, yet they let me say it like it was the first time. I am grateful for long scandalous conversations, .I am grateful for rides given when i purposely drank too much. I am grateful for the hugs, the kisses, the i love yous, the constant and steady reminder that i was worth loving. You saved me when i couldn't save myself.
This year I am the most grateful for myself. I know this looks selfish, however, it's been a long time, like never. I am grateful that no matter what happens in my life I have the ability to love, and be loved. I am grateful that i have found my trust again - that my bitterness did not cause blindness- that i was able to appreciate the love in my life that comes from all directions - from my children, my friends, my co-workers even, and my self. I am grateful to have finally found my self worth and my happiness.
To friends and family in the past, I am grateful to have known you and have you shape my present. I am grateful that each person in my past has brought me to this point and that my lessons were learned, the love that was shared will never be forgotten and the memories bring smiles to my face. I am grateful to have been shaped by having you in my life for the time you were there.
My wish this year, on the day of thanks is that all my loved ones realize their value in my life and in the lives of others. Eat, drink, be happy and share the love! Happy Thanksgiving.
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