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First day

 Back to the office today.  Leaving Koda "locked up" in the kitchen broke my heart.  His favorite place is in front of the sliding glass doors in the living room.  He can't even see that from the kitchen.  He screamed, and screamed, and my soft heart wanted to let him out but he doesn't have a crate and it's not safe for a puppy to roam the house while no one is there to monitor him.

So scream he shall, until he stops.  

This is the first time letting him be unhappy......booo.

No LIKE.

It may explain the mood i'm in.  I can't care about anything involving men, or the potential of them being around me, or not.  I don't care.  It's nothing but work and disapointment.

And yet i keep interacting.

What if I just don't?

I have to tell this new guy that now is not the time.  I'm just not ready to date, or kiss, or even THINK about being involved with another man while i still have the dust unsettled from Mr. Cigar.

I did text with Mr. Cigar a bit yesterday and i felt nothing.  I saw his banter as a huge avoidance of what actually occurred.  He found my key and he won in his shooting division over the weekend.  I said "congratulations"  When where and how am i getting my key?  To which he responded he was "trying to figure that out and would let me know.....

Really?

You can win a shooting competition, run a successful business.......but can't figure out how to arrange to return a key on the fly?  Give me a break.

I don't even care.

I almost told him to shove the key up his nose into his brain..........but thought that might come back and bite me.  

Oops theres that part of me that hates being taken as stupid. 

So i'm in a mood.  I need to get back into a pattern, a routine with the puppy.  Get my head out of my ass.

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