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Ghosts of dating lessons

 It figures, doesn't it, that the one guy I have any interest in spending time with keeps me hanging.

I know it's not healthy.  I know I've lamented on this and I'm still coaching myself through the "leave him be" and "take care of me" experiment in learning from past mistakes.

Can't help it, I like him.  A lot.  Ugh. Idiot.

In the meantime I have men I've briefly dated sending me messages that go unanswered, yet they continue to reach out......and I think to myself.."don't be like that"  Don't be the text that he receives, rolls his eyes, and doesn't bother answering.

I got a heartfelt "lets try this again" yesterday from a man who left me the most juvenile, nasty, valentine on my doorstep because I dared to tell him I didn't want to see him anymore.  I think, NO THANK YOU. Short memory much?   

Then there's the guy that took my ending it well, but stalks my social media while he has a girlfriend.  

My ex checks in occasionally out of curiosity, I'm sure.  And I do the same to him.  At least I don't feel angry about that.

But these others..........

So here we go again...

Enjoy the challenges of my work, and appreciate the fact that I interact daily with brilliant successful people who think I'm pretty amazing.  Revel in that because I earned it, and I want more.  Appreciate the fact that I am acknowledged as worthy and more, finally, by people I respect.

Work on my physical being - yes, working on my brain is always my preference, but keep paying attention to what I put in my body for nourishment.  Walk more. Resistance training, yoga, pilates.....balance and core strength.  Do this every day and create the habit that seems so hard, but once you start, isn't.

Baby myself.  Don't take those long luxurious showers just because you think you will see "him".  Take that time every day to care for yourself.  Wear the lacey underthings and be the only one that knows.  Lotion your body and massage your own temples with scented oils.....all that attention you love to give to the man in your life should be directed at YOURSELF.  

It's okay to want him, but he's only a small part of your life because that is his choice.  It leaves a lot of time for you to explore and meet other people with varied interests.  Join that club, do that volunteer work, and go meet people you have things in common with.  Give your attention to those who actually want it.  And if he wants to see you, it's okay to see him, but he is renting only a small portion of your life because he hasn't shown himself to want or deserve more than that.  As long as you enjoy him, go ahead and enjoy him.  But don't let that hold you back.  keep your eyes, mind and heart open to the world and all it's options.


There's my pep talk for the day.  Don't be pathetic, go live.  Don't be like the men that continue to reach out to you when you've made it clear you are not interested.  

Be the prize in your own life and someday you may meet someone romantically that thinks you are the bomb.   


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