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The crazy part

 I'm just going to say it.

I think this man may want to date me because he thinks i will move in to his home and help him pay his bills. There i said the nasty thought in my head. 

First.  Never going to happen.  I'm not moving in with anyone again.  Male, female, whatever.  I am a solo party.  And IF i ever changed my mind about that it would be after retirement.  I have to come first in my life right now and for a while.  I cannot depend on a man financially or i will fuck myself again.  

Second.  He hasn't even secured a second date with me yet so the above thought makes me officially crazy.

We talk consistently.  Phone, text....not hours but conversations.  Getting to know each other.  We are supposed to get together this weekend for a ride.  But as i said, no real plans have been made.

Today he says it's going to rain tomorrow, good day for staying in and watching movies.  (He has mentioned a few times that he wants to take friday off)

No thank you.

I know what that is.

Not interested in yet another "hang out and fuck" man. 

It's so hard for me not to instantly judge on what is probably an innocent comment but i've heard these comments before.  

I told him i work remotely on Friday and that it's not a day off for me.

And then "finances do not allow" him to take the day off....okay.  I know he depends on overtime, like a lot of people.  I wish i got overtime, but instead I got stability forcing me to live within my means with both feet in debt. 

Am i just in a pissy mood?  

I ordered ice cream to be delivered by Uber eats.  It's not here yet.  It could be i'm just being a bitch.

Or.  It could be that i've dated some pretty flaky men and i'm over this shit.  

Back to observing the behavior of the male species without verbalizing negativity with no cause.    Especially since we mean nothing to each other but a few combined hours of talk. 

He's probably bored or thinks i'm frigid since i refuse to have sexy talk.  Wait till he finds out i'm not sleeping with him any time soon.  HAAHAHAA yeah, i don't know why i bother either.


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