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Taxes and birth

Yesterday i paid alllllll my taxes.  

And got my birth certificate.

I wasn't born an 11lb baby.  I was 8lbs 80z.   My mother wasn't 19 when she had me.  She was 21.  

Why would anyone lie about something so......

I mean, i don't think she was on drugs........but who really knows?  

She made it sound like i was a burden to carry and give birth to.  That i ruined her young life by existing.  That i was a mistake.  She threw me away like garbage.

I've been over the mother scars for years and years now.  Time and therapy help but then something as innocent as getting my birth certificate reminds me of how toxic and malfunctioning the women who "raised" me till 16 was/is.

I think i turned out rather well, considering.

Anyhoo....it was an emotional gut punch to me, even though anyone with "normal" parents might not understand why.

Yesterday kinda of sucked.

But today is a new day, and i've got goals to accomplish.

Onward. 




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