I spent the weekend away again - actually worked from Milford in order to beat the traffic that ususally makes the one hour ride, two hours. Neither of my friends were home, i was told to just make myself at home.
So i set up shop at their kitchen table and worked until it was time to stop. Read my book and cuddled in the recliner with Miyagi until they arrived home.
If you had told me i would be spending many of my weekends with this couple I wouldn't have believed you. I'm a homebody. I like my space, my quiet, my no answering to or having to talk to anyone. And yet, I'm never stressed out with them. They are family.
Saturday i had my very first massage that wasn't part of physical therapy. Jen took me, and laughed when i kept saying "1 and 1/2 hours? And i have to take my clothes off?".....she told me to relax and stop it. Just do it. Well we did and let me tell you.........i'll be doing it again. That was lovely.
And then Saturday night Shenanigans (whats left of us) arrived and we drank and ate and kept changing the music on Alexa while we played games. We had a little fun poking at somebody who has recently detached from us due to politics.
So dumb. But okay, byeeeeeee.
Once you turn your back on me and walk away i'm all set. No chasing, no upset, just done. I've spent too many years of my life chasing people who weren't worthy of my time - and if you can't use your words and have an adult conversation with me about whatever it is bothering you, and your choice is to disappear? Stay gone. You were never a friend to me.
I keep my friends, wether they see me a lot, or only talk to me once a year, they are my friend. If i called them in need, they would be there. If they called me in need, i would be there. Time means nothing. Actions and how you show up for each other mean everything.
And if i can laugh and be myself with you that's saying a LOT. I'm a slow warm.
Give me an ultimatum; tell me i can't associate with someone without losing you? Bye. Thats not how i live. I never fit into any one group in my life and i'm not starting now.
It will hurt. And then it won't. Life goes on.
Anyways- I fell off the dating cart again. I can't seem to drum up any interest or time. It could be the men, but more likely it's me. I'm busy. I'm happy. I'm living life without drama.
Mr. Music will become a friend i think. I'm going to see him play this weekend and that should be fun. He's a muscian so he has a lot of friends/acquaintances. I'm not sure there would be room in his life for anything more and i don't know how i would handle all the adoring females. Putting the cart ahead of me again, although, he does seem to be interested in continuing to talk and meet. Who knows. Maybe he has a big ego and won't like that i'm not googoo over him because of his career. Not much impresses me beyond being a good person. He does seem like that so far.
Back to work week. It's my busy time so i'm brain tired.
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