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do it anyways

 One thing i used to love doing with a partner was to get in the car and just go somewhere random on a nice day.  See where the road took us.  Find somewhere new to us.

So today, i did it even though I did it alone.

And i still had a nice time.

My morning started off with me trying to figure out what i wanted to do with my last day off from work.  I was scrolling through TikTok and I follow a woman who goes to all the thrift stores in New England.  Today I watched her pick up food she had ordered from an app called "Too good to go".  Participating restaurants put together goodie bags, mostly day old food or leftovers, and sell them at drastically reduced prices.  You have no idea what you are getting.  It's a risk.  It's an adventure.  So I downloaded and opened the app to see what was available within a reasonable distance from me and ordered TWO goodie bags......one from two different places in the same town.


Then i took a shower like a normal human, and got dressed to go out.  The restaurants were about 1/2 an hour away and i had to drive through Hartford to get there.  The traffic wasn't bad and the locations were easy to find.  All went well.  I cannot believe the amount of food i got for a grand total of $10 and all of it pretty much went into my freezer.  

I went to two places i haven't been before and got "surprise" food without a lot of risk.  It was kind of fun and it got me out of the house.

As i was driving home it occurred to me that there was a time when the thought of driving through Hartford gave me a panic attack. In high school i was friends with a girl who drove herself to Boston every weekend and i thought she was literally wonder woman.  8 years ago i drove myself to New York for the first  time by myself and ever since then i've lost my fear of driving.  I go wherever i want now.  I never thought i would be that person......to drive far away by myself, to eat in restaurants by myself, to go to movies by myself.

For the longest time i have waited for that special guy to do it all with and it has finally occurred to me to stop waiting for other people.  If i want to go, i'm going.  If no one else wants to, I'm going to do it anyways.

<3

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