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The real re-start

 I'm motivated.

I took all the carpets that i had put in storage and brought them back.  I'm deep cleaning them (Its hot as hell in my apartment due to being in the center unit and everyone cranking their heat because of the ridiculous cold weather)  They will dry fast.

I had put them in storage because Miyagi was piddling on them - first sign he was failing since he always used the peepee pads before that.  Yes, my dog was a whopping 5 lbs and had a bladder the size of a teaspoon.  He used peepee pads.  There was no way he was going 8 hours without peeing, or even one hour.  

So....no more buying peepee pads.  Now i can put the carpets back.  

I'd rather have Miyagi back.  

I'm also keeping myself busy. Trying to start what to me, is a new life.  No pets?  No need to come home every day?  No-one to greet me at the door or sit in the window watching me?  I am going to let my son and his wife keep Ninja.  I feel an emptiness inside me.  She shouldn't be here alone all the time and they are home more often.  They have a kitty and Ninja will have a sister.  I think it's best for her.

I feel empty.

Work is picking up so that will keep my brain occupied while i adjust to being completely alone.  No calls to look forward to, no plans to make for dinner, no visiting the dogs at Bills house.......I need a new routine.  A HEALTHY routine that gives back to me.

This weekend it will be really cold again, and i am staying home and doing what i do.  Cleaning, re-arranging, crafting, sleeping, reading, binge watching tv.......alone.  And that's okay.  

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