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the joys of dating sites

 You never know what is on the other end of that conversation.  Profiles with pictures that are not who they are, descriptions that are leaving out the most important parts.......It's a crap shoot.

The Ranger guy turned nasty with strange texts and when i told him basically "good luck" he went on a long rant about how fat, old and ugly i am and how no one will ever want to date me.

Basically, he sounded like a woman.  Most men, even jerks, would just say "fuck off you fat ugly bitch"....but this one had paragraphs.  Catfished.

You always have to be conscious that people are not always what they say they are.  

I tend to only talk to one person at a time.  I know, i'm supposed to talk to many, date a few and have sex with one......(a good rule i stumbled on years ago) but damn, i don't have the energy for all that.  Or the interest.  Plus i can't keep them straight.  

So, "Ranger" boy off the table, i see what else is going on in my inbox.  Now i'm talking to Don from MA.  He's a Marine Veteran, so he says.  Here's a good sign, he got frustrated with the texting and asked if he could call me.  Then we chatted for about an hour before i ended the call.  He said he never talks to anyone this long and we both got a chuckle.  He sure sounds like a man.  Good conversation, he asked great questions, gave good answers to mine and no "icks" were uncovered.  He did say he didn't want to scare me off but he does have PTSD and he had back surgery last year.  

So, here's a Marine, telling me he has PTSD and i immediately think of my therapist telling me I had PTSD and it makes me wonder if this is the next ADHD diagnosis.  Where everyone has it so we can make money on the meds associated with controlling it?  Because i'm quite sure that HIS PTSD is real compared to me hitting a few bumps in life that i still react to.  

He is 60 and lives in Veteran housing, has no addictions, but does smoke a lot of weed.  He is 100% financially taken care of and brings in more money a month than i do not to mention all the benefits like no taxes, etc.  Is this a good thing or a deal breaker?

I will continue to get to know him, see if we meet and if there is any "spark".  Slowly.  Who knows? He could be another catfish or sissy man.  It's a gamble.

There are 3 cardinals that visit me every day.  They are clearly visible when i look out the window but I have not yet been able to take a good picture of all three of them at once.  The squirrel that used to visit Ninja has been visiting daily, and now he has a friend.  Another squirrel.  I might have to buy peanuts and feed them on the regular. My boss wants me to adopt a crow but i don't even know how to begin.  I've been thinking about an octopus, because they are so smart and have short life spans.  For now, i'm just getting used to not cleaning up after, or feeding any live creatures that will break my heart when they leave me.

I'm realizing that my living in this apartment is not temporary.  This is home.  Slowly i've been decorating "renter friendly" and getting rid of things that no longer serve me in place of things i have actively chosen.  Next weekend i think i'm picking up a full wall entertainment center and then selling the electric fireplace that i never use.  

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