Yesterday i went out to my car for a half hour deep sleep nap at lunch. I couldn't keep my eyes open, Sleep was horrible the night before. My ELBOWS hurt, all my joints hurt. so strange.
After work i had every intention of eating and going to bed, but Mr. Cigar wanted to go out. I went to his house for the first time since I left for my cruise in January. I expected to see a lot of women things, but it was exactly the same. When i asked him, he told me that she has nothing.
We took his ride and went out to "At the Corner" in Litchfield. We had such a good time and on the way back we were listening to good music and chair dancing.
It never occurred to me to ask him if she knew we were going out.
She had texted that she had gotten out of class early and was on her way home. When we got there he kept trying to call her to come out so we could all go for a ride. When she wouldn't answer i started getting a bad feeling.
I saw the dog and got out of the truck to give him more rubbies and let Rocky have the front seat. She came out of the garage and went wild.
She had no idea. She came home to an empty house and my car in her spot. She came home to us being out to dinner together and neither of us had told her.
Not. good.
I felt her upset in my whole body. She wanted nothing to do with me as i stood there silently (this is HER home not mine) and she told Mr. Cigar whats what. She is tiny but ......her upset was very large. And understandable.
She went inside, I kissed him goodnight and left. What is there to say? We have to do better. That wasn't right.
She began texting me her hurt and upset and all i could say to her was we have no idea what we are doing, or how this all works and that she had every right to be upset because she wasn't expecting it and i was sorry. I let her vent.
Then she said "i was here FIRST"
and i had to address it. I'm not going to play these games.
I responded "and you left twice. this isn't a competition"
She cooled her jets. Eventually she said goodnight.
This morning Mr. Cigar called and i did not ask. He told me she was acting like nothing happened the previous night. I told him we had texted back and forth. He had gone straight up to bed after i left. There was no fighting.
Which i'm positive hurt her. To have all that emotion and not know what to do with it and have your partner cut you out..........sucks. This morning i told her that that was one of the perks of having another woman around. You can at least be heard.
She did contact me this morning, apologizing. And i told her she had a perfectly understandable reaction. That this isn't easy for any of us. He doesn't know how to do this, obviously. She hasn't even ever been curious about this type of relationship and i'm sure she is feeling all kinds of messed up. I can't imagine.
I don't know what the future holds. It's going to be bumpy. I may be crazy and asking for chaos, or it might end up being the perfect relationship for me. Double the love.
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