I have to say, i enjoy going home and being able to rip off my bra and shoes after i take Miyagi outside to pee. I walk in and he's waiting for me, happy to see me. When he's done i go pour out food for him and Ninja (kitty) then go sit in my comfy recliner and turn on the news. I usually scroll social media until i get hungry and then go decide what i'm doing for dinner. I love leftovers.
Some nights i hop on TikTok live while i work on whatever project i'm working on. Most recently it's been a bullet journal for Jen and i'm almost done. The final touches are what makes it. Then i will go back to mine. Last night i just sat in my recliner and binge watched Big Bang Theory because i've never watched it all the way through the seasons. That show makes me laugh every time. I like laughing. It's my favorite.
All the christmas movies are out and next i'll start binging them too as i clean, or work on projects. And you know what? I'm perfectly happy. I love not being on the phone, or having to talk to someone about something i don't want to talk about, or having to take into account someone elses moods or needs. It's very peaceful. I take good care of myself and i'm fun.
Not answering to another human is exactly what i need. The danger, i'm told, is that you get so used to it that you lose your tolerance for anyone else in your life. Like a hermit. I don't think thats true. I just need a like minded hermit. Someone who can share space with me and not have to always be interacting. Someone who can do their own thing, while i do my thing, only together.
Obviously, not always. I mean, there's sex. Lot's of sex. And cuddling. And sometimes cooking together but it's not ever a "whats for dinner" like it's my job to feed an able adult belly. It's more like "Hey, do you want to try this recipe out tonight?" or "I'm going to order pizza, do you want something too?"
If i ever hear "whats for dinner" from a man again, i may have to spend a short time in jail after. That mentality is for the birds.
See? It's happening already. No tolerance.
Also, i firmly believe in separate bedrooms if we are going to entertain the thought of living together. His and Hers. Not a man cave or a she cave. Separate sleeping situations. Sleep together when it works for both, then visit. In his room, his rules, in her room, her rules. Even if you switch back and forth every night, it still gives each of you the opportunity to sleep comfortably when together is keeping you awake. And without venom. It's not an "i hate you" move, it's an "I love you and I want us to sleep good tonight" move.
Plus, it's personal space that i think so many people give up and then feel bitter about later.
The rest of the house is both. And if you can't share the common areas then you shouldn't be living together. Cleaning should be done by both, because the mess is made by both. Cleaning is a gift to me, it means i have a home. It's how i take care of myself and my loved one.
Maybe he has a sports/collection room, and i have a craft room - or basement or garage. Maybe they are the same area but combined. Whatever, you get the idea. I love that idea. It's like two besties hanging out doing the things they like to do separately, only together.
And a social life. I love to have friends over especially when I can have a fire. Everyone brings their own cooler, and chair, and we just sit and enjoy each others company without it being a lot of work or huge event. It's just friends hanging out. Men and women together.
Because no drama. Maybe once in a while we do a more formal thing, like a friendsgiving, or a celebration for someone. Or throw a christmas party. or Halloween. But that is something we both agree on and want to do, not something the other person is forced into.
I want a private home, but a welcoming one. I want friends and family to feel welcome - as long as they call us first. ha ha. I plan on being naked a lot.
The thing is, i can do all of that by myself. And i kind of do. It would be fun to do it with a man who wants those things too. I want to be in love. I want someone to have my back and vice versa. I want that special man who is my friend first, and my lover always. I want it all.
and i want my space too.
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