Full switch

 This weekend started out like most others.  I work from home on fridays and this allows me to switch off laundry and do some basic chores while i'm on calls.  Multi tasking at its finest.  Fridays are my "busy" days because i'm trying to get all the weeks left over stuff off my desk, and plan for the next week.

Mr. Cigar went out to lunch with an old friend (translated to old lover) and her cousin who were visiting from out of state.  We had not made plans to see each other, and we didn't.  Friday was a chill night for me and i went live on tiktok and ended up in a group on someone elses page chatting away.  More new friends.  It was fun.  

Saturday i was supposed to be going to a shenanigans gathering but the host this time fell ill and needed to cancel.  Unfortunately, i have a LOT of appetizer meatballs that everyone loves.....i hope i can freeze them or i will be eating them all week.  When plans got cancelled i let Mr. Cigar know and he invited me to meet him at his place later to go out for dinner.

He likes it when i dress up.  He also takes pride in how he dresses which is very nice.  So i took the time to glam it up a bit.  It didn't matter where we were going honestly.  I just enjoy giving him what he wants.  So i wore a beautiful button down silky blouse that i've been wanting to wear, slim cut dark wash jeans (that fit perfectly) and my leopard booties with the kitten heals.  Casual, but "more". 

He took me to DeFrancos Restaurant in Litchfield, where we sat outside and enjoyed the beautiful weather.  A very casual place, however the pricing.......jesus.  We shared an appetiser of broccoli rabe (my favorite) and had shrimp and scallops for the main.  For a "casual" place, the food is top notch.  He was attentive and complimentary- i was relaxed and enjoyed myself.

He paid the bill, as he has been every time he has taken me out this round.  Now, i do not expect this, but our first go around was less than satisfactory - He really was a miserable fuck.  He is still the same smart ass man, quick with a comeback, but he feels different.  That anger isn't there, that sparking tension that always made me on guard is gone.  He still busts my ass but the meanness isn't present.

I'm still watching.

I don't want to make this something it isn't.  Or get smacked in the face with reality.  Time takes time.  

We went back to his house and played with the boys then sat our full bellies down in front of the television to watch the news on several channels - which i really like.  We don't agree on everything but the important things........i like that he watches more than one channel and calls out the descrepencies on all....like i do.  The news is a reality tv show, scripted for views.  On this we agree 100%.  So it's kind of fun picking on the content and postulating on what is really happening.

It was getting to the time i usually leave and he asked me if Miyagi had eaten before i came over, which i confirmed, wondering why he would ask such an odd thing. Then he asked me if i would stay.  

I haven't ever stayed over.  Once, i fell asleep because we had been drinking and stayed until 2am but left. He has never invited and i have obviously never asked. I like that he considered Miyagi.  I said yes, but i would need to leave very early because i haven't ever left him that long.  

We went upstairs to bed, where we talked and laughed and ........went to sleep.  slobs.  I had a hard time sleeping because big dogs in a silent house are very loud.  Of course they chose to groom their balls in the middle of the night.......lord.  At one point i woke up and there were two massive heads on  the bed next to each other just staring at me.  I was startled and when i squeeked, they were delighted and thought it was time to play.  I told them sternly, go lay down. and........they did.

i have taken them both outside in their yard (5 acres mind you) and walked around with them off leash by myself.  Cane walks the perimeter, and waits for me to catch up, then carries on.  Abel stays close but wanders........We have never come across an animal, or person and i don't know what will happen if that happens.  They listen to me because they choose to, i'm not pretending i have any actual control over these massive beasts. Mr. Cigar is the pack leader and when he is around their eyes are on him at all times. Let's face it, i'm the fun one.  

One day we were sitting on the living room floor seeing how flexible Mr. Cigar can be (discussing yogo classes) and Cane came and sat down in my lap.  Mr. Cigar yelled at him and then told me that was a power move and not to allow it.

I thought he was crazy.

But i looked it up.  It is dominance after all.  And here i thought he just liked me and wanted to cuddle.  Mr. Cigar does not allow them up on the couch with us unless he invites them to their spots.  Listen, i'm still traumatized over the dog walking freak out that he had on Abel.......but there is a small voice in my brain that reminds me he has total control over these bully dogs. Two of them.  And he's not a big man, although his energy is huge.  

I'd still never be able to treat a dog that severely, and that is why I have a 5 lb dog.  He caters to their food, and they are definitely well taken care of.........maybe i was wrong about the walking episode, but i still hated it. It still scared the shit out of me.  And him yelling at me not to touch the "fucking dog" still pisses me off.  BUT. They aren't my dogs.

We woke up extremely early and had coffee - the day before he had said he wanted to take me to lunch to meet some friends of his, a couple, that he shoots with.  So while we were talking about that he asked if i would come back earlier and go shopping with him before we went to lunch.  

Who is this man.

What the fuck is happening here?

This is how i've experienced relationships in the past.........doing stuff together, the daily stuff of life.

What is this trap??????  Ha.  thats me being "negative".......and i'm kidding.

It felt normal, easy and right.

I went home took Miyagi for a walk and spent some time with him - showered, picked an outfit for later and went back to his place.

We went grocery shopping - then came back to the house and i went outside with the dogs while he unpacked the loot. This, may have been one of my favorite moments, where i could see this as a normal saturday together.

But i'm watching.

Now is the fun part - We got ready together.  Usually it's me getting ready and the guy has put minimum effort into his appearance and is waiting for me.  Not Mr. Cigar.  We shared the space in his master suite bathroom and he groomed while i made up.......he dug into my makeup bag for tweezers and this sounds strange to me, but i had fun getting ready with him.  We checked each others outfits, he asked my opinion on sports coats......he fixed my zipper in the back.....we admired each others choices and complimented each others appearance.  

I don't know how to explain this.......i've never had that.  And i liked it a lot.  

Then we took the hour long ride to the Black Rabbit restaurant in Lakeville, CT.  It was very casual so the sports coat stayed in the car, but i reminded him that it was better to be over dressed then underdressed.....We looked good. I of course, had all black on,  which fits in anywhere.  His friends were an extremely nice couple - She is very italian with the beautiful accent and spicy personality - he is very handsome and charming - their vibe was funny and easy.  I enjoyed myself and i believe they liked me too.  

I have to say this because I was nervous and felt a little stupid for being nervous.  Not because they had to like me as Mr. Cigars friends, but because these people are extremely wealthy.  Extremely.  Way out my understanding of wealth kind of wealthy.  

And they were funny and nice just like us normal folk. Who would have thought.

It was a lovely weekend - exactly how i would imagine a life together should be.  Meeting up with friends, doing chores, sharing life together not completely separate in the same area but not up each others ass either.

Wish me luck.