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 I'm stable and reliable........until it comes to men.

I have a girlfriend who i love dearly, and we both agree that she is extremely high maintenance.  She is a LOT.  And she has no luck with dating.  Even before she had her daughter she had nothing but drama in her love life.  

I'm starting to think thats me too.

I don't have drama with my friends or family.  Glitches once in a while, but never full out drama or confusion over our "status". 

When i'm single, there is literally no upset.  Even with work, and with uncertainty with life in general.....no personal drama.

Enter a man and i lose my mind. 

Am i controlling?  over myself, yes.  Am i negative? yes, when the situation is clearly negative.  But i'm also the one that always finds the bright spot.  I can always find the positive outcome from a shit situation.

Unless it's with a man.

Why.

I notice when something slips, when something has changed.  When things don't add up.  The problem is I voice it, and then they get defensive.  

What have i learned from previous experience?  When a question is avoided, or met with defensiveness or deflection........something is up.  Otherwise, a straight answer would be delivered.

So i watch.  And my guard goes up a little more instead of going down.  And i start to care a little less about the outcome, because me?  I'm not a fan of the unknown, or the unsure.

Good bad or ugly.......if he doesn't make it known where i stand with him, then i am not a priority.

Good to know. 


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