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Taking myself back to the start

 Before i met Bill i was in a really good place regarding men.  Take them or leave them.  The only one that actually made any impact on me was Mr. Tattoo.  

So i had my day of soothing my wounds yesterday, eating brownies, not exercising, doing stuff around my home.  I had waves of tears, and let them come.  Get it out now darling, because tomorrow is another day.

I woke up this morning to Bill "liking" and "hearting" my pictures on FB.  And "poking" me.

Thats pretty childish.  I'm on his mind and that is the amount of effort he can give me.  If it wasn't pathetic, i would laugh.

Instead, I let me come out.  I don't care about dating rules, and how a woman is supposed to respond or not......i'm myself.  

I texted him. Lots of effort there. lol  I said "i seem to be still on your mind" to which he says "of course silly"

Playing childish games and i'm silly.    He say he's trying to be better and not trying to hurt me.  LMAO. Dude.

I said, "That's irrelevant. (his favorite word)  We know where we stand.  I'm not the one.  That means letting me go."

and he responded with exactly what i expected.  Okay i will leave you alone i apologize.

No he's not sorry.  He wants his fan girl to not forget him.

Eventually i will.  It will take time.  But i will move on because that was the choice.  I did send him one more text and told him he should ask himself why i'm still on his mind. 

He will pop up again in a few days.  He told me i'm predictable, but he's the one that is predictable.

Low effort men aren't on my list of things to do.

Besides that, my inbox is full this time around and i'm talking to a few gentlemen that actually know how to hold a conversation without calling me names or putting me down.  I may even accept a few invitations to go out.  Who knows?

however, the next time i catch a vibe like i did Friday night, i will just turn around and get back in my car.  I don't need to be polite to losers.

See?  Each date i learn.  Each man i get attached to, (two in 9 years what a streak) I learn.  They don't want me and guess what?  I survived.  It doesn't break me not to have my feelings returned.  It makes me stronger for the next man.

And more importantly, for myself. 

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